May Reflections

I hate to copy everyone else and say that this month flew by so quickly.. but I really don’t have anything better to say… (I’ll try again next month). First of all, sorry for the MIA, everyone. This month has been unbelievably hectic! Between visiting my family (16 hours away) and moving to a new city (7 hours away), I have so much to do and so much to think about.

Time has gone, what have I done?

  • Made a trip to my home in the mountains and helped my family with a seemingly never-ending list of errands and chores (mostly things to do with electronics and calls to customer service centers). I don’t mind, it’s not often that I get to help out around the house, so I happily did it. Being the only really fluent English speaker (until the kids- my siblings- get older), I get to do most the bank/electronic/phone/internet calls while I’m home. I also helped the kids (my siblings) with their end-of-year tests- I remember a time where I had to take those. So, yeah, my trip was really 90% work and 10% play.
    • All the boring stuff aside, I celebrated mother’s day and my mom’s birthday that weekend! It’s all worth it to see her happy and have all four of her children by her side. Spent quality time with my brother and sisters. Took them (my younger siblings) to Six Flags Roller Coaster Park for a day out. We watched Guardians of the Galaxy 2. We made home cooked popcorn, buttered noodles, boba smoothies, and my very own Chi’s Special (vegetable-lasagne-4 cheese-spaghetti-eggplant-seaweed). We played Minecraft and manyyy board games.
    • My parents rode a roller coaster ride for the first time (we made them). They were genuinely terrified- I don’t think I’ve ever felt sorrier in my life. It’s funny how we always think our parents are invincible. When we look at the big picture, they’re really just humans. They have feelings and uncertaintain. Still, it’s very scary to see them lose control. Not doing that again.
  • Wandered around New York
    • Taking nostalgic walks through Central Park, East Harlem, Wall Street, and 14th Street.
  • Won Broadway Show Tickets
    • War Paint – A thrilling musical, showing how makeup and women played a role in history.
    • Wicked – Possibly my favorite Broadway show in awhile. I won my first in-person lottery tickets, it was so exhilarating. The vocals of Elphaba gave me chills and put me on the edge of my seat.
    • Miss Saigon – This show portrays the extensive amounts of hardships of Vietnamese women during the Vietnam War. I find it mind-blowing, that these events happen during the time of my parents’ generation, and that my parents and their loved ones undergo the terror of war.
    • Julius Caesar – We won tickets to Shakespeare in the Park. I’ve always had a hard time understanding Old English. This time is no different. I loved that they made it contemporary, and the Trump comparison is hilarious.
  • Learned how to use Instagram (I know, I know, what century are we in? Noob!).  I learned how to properly use the hashtag “#”. I’ve never cared too much for social media. I generally use Facebook to keep in touch with people, see what their up to, and share my adventures. That’s about it. Now, I have Instagram! Which is awesome, because I now have a place to dump all my travel photos! I’m still very bad at it, but if you want to check out my photos, my ID is winta_wanderland. I would love advice/tips to improve on it!
  • Shows/Movies/Books ~ I am so pleased to tell you that my partner and I have been keeping our TV watching to a minimum (at most 1-2 TV episodes a day). Back in the day, we would binge watch shows we like until we finish! In addition, I’m trying a couple of new genres of movies/books. So far, so good!
    • The Gunslinger by Stephen King – Though this isn’t typically the type of book I read, I finished within three days. I highly admire his smooth writing skills, and look forward to reading more of his works.
    • Brooklyn Nine Nine – Season finale already? Ugh. Another year, here we go. This show was very cool to watch, especially during our stay in New York City. We would to relate to this and that, try to identify the subway station, the food stand, and also understand all the references. ūüėČ
    • Guardians of the Galaxy 2 – Drax is the absolute best. I recommend watching this movie just for Drax. <3
    • Malibu’s Most Wanted – a hilarious movie about a rich, white boy who is a gansta at heart.
    • Sausage Party – very crass humor, but surprisingly thought provoking, and brings up many controversial issues.

Our stay in NYC is coming to an end as we search for a new place in the wonderful city of Richmond, Virginia. It’s a relatively big decision for us because we have decided to get our first one year lease! No longer as nomadic as we used to be. Thankfully, The rent in Virginia is half the price for twice the size. We will even have our own balcony! And maaaybe a pool. I’m rooting for it.

My blog highlights:

Things I’m Thankful For:

  • My supportive parents. I’m reaching the stage where I am beginning to understand my parents and how many difficult decisions they have to face to raise four children. I personally think that’s too much responsibility for me. One. Maybe two. But not four. And bills. I have been drowning in bills, bills, bills since coming to New York. It’s amazing how carefree I was back in the day. I’m proud of my parents for being ultra sucessful – a house, three cars, four kids, a small business, and they get all their bills paid. Respect.
  • My loving partner and best friend. I can’t imagine why anybody would put up with me through my worst moods, laziest days, angriest rants, etc. for so long, but I’m so thankful I have him by my side.
  • My three fun and unique siblings. I can always count on them to make my day brighter.
  • Mom’s food. Because no one cooks like her.
  • This city, and all that it has to offer. I’m going to miss the vibrant people, the efficient and ever so frustrating subway system, the foods, the streets, the constant buzz of activity, and of course, the Broadway shows. 
  • Unlimited resources to learn and improve. How do I do life? How do I make friends? Where’s the next anime convention? How do I create a rocking cosplay from home?
  • Cars/subways/bikes/transportation in general.
  • Access to a roof over my head/cheap rent. I’m looking forward to having some walking room, a full kitchen, and a parking space for half the price.
  • People on the Internet/readers of my blog/awesome, supportive friends: You all make me glow.

Goals for June

Finding an apartment, moving in, adapting to a new city. I am, again, moving without a definite plan in my destination. There’s always that unsettling fear of whether or not I’ll find a job there. I’ve been fine so far, and thriving in New York City, so I doubt Virginia is going to be a challenge. I loooove the idea of being between the mountains and the ocean. I’m always excited for a prospect of living and exploring a new city. Here’s my chance to document the process on my travel blog. <3

My 3rd year anniversary with my partner is coming up. Gah! How have we gotten so far already? On the other hand, has it only been three years? After spending almost one collective year of long distance, we really learned to communicate better- I’m so proud of us. We’re both very stubborn and self-righteous, fought countless of battles, but at the end of the day, we still have each other on our highest pedestal. We’ve traveled to countless of places together and experienced a world of new adventures.

The kids are off school for the summer. And they have a summer goals list. I really need to rethink my own goals. It’s funny how kids have summer to be free and do nothing all year, and adults don’t have a “summer break.” Still, it shouldn’t stop me from making productive goals. 

Pick up some old hobbies: 

  • Learn some new tunes on my ukulele.
  • Create an Etsy account and make nerdy crocheted dolls to sell. I have some pictures of them here.
  • Finish up some video games on Steam and Playstation.

Blogging goals:

  • Weekly challenges! – I am hoping to participate in a weekly challenge with a couple of my blogging friends, let me know if you’re interested in joining!
  • Create my own award! With all the awards and love going around, I want to create a couple of my own awards to start a pay-it-forward chain!
  • Create my own blogging challenge for myself and others. Stay tuned for my upcoming travel/lifestyle/photo blog challenge!
  • More guest posts!

Thanks for reading! How is May looking for you? Have any awesome upcoming goals? Please share!!

Not Good Enough

I’m not good enough.¬†

There are days where negativity bullies its way in to haunt my mind, jabbing at my frustrations of things that I can’t control. It leaves me helpless, my thoughts trapped in a never-ending cycle of discouragement. My inability to do things with my life that I want to because I am restrained by society’s expectations. The incessant need to prove myself. The words that I can’t speak elegantly enough. The constant questioning of whether I’m a productive member of society. Whether I have become lazy. One thought after another, weight added¬†onto my shoulders.

I fight to push these thoughts back. Watch a movie. Read a book. Talk to family. But it’s still there- lurking in the back of my consciousness. It doesn’t work. Gray as a heavy thundercloud right before a storm.¬†The tension builds up so heavy with so many thoughts in my head that I want to explode.

I read somewhere that to be happy, one should write down 10 things they’re grateful for everyday. I’ve been doing that on and off for years. The first time I wrote, I only came up to six. The more I practice, the better I get at remembering the things that I’m thankful for. It’s easy to take for granted the things that you have and should appreciate. So, to cheer myself up today, here are 10 things I’m grateful for:

  1. Loved ones who are always supportive of who I am and what I do. Whether they know it or not, talking to them always makes me feel better. Supported. Loved.
  2. Independence and freedom to do the things I want to.¬†I am not being forced to do anything I don’t want to.
  3. My health. I’m able to get up everyday. I’m healthy. I’m¬†happy with my self image.
  4. Books and online educational resources that allow me to improve every day.
  5. Beautiful weather. I love seeing the flowers blossom in this time of year. I love hearing the rain prattle softly outside.
  6. A roof over my head, a bed to sleep on, and public transportation to get around.
  7. Food. Today, strawberry and rocky road ice cream, topped with a sliced banana.
  8. Music.¬†Lately, it’s been slow jazz and classical.
  9. Coffee. I love drinking coffee on early mornings, with a book in my hand. <3
  10. This Blog gives me a sense of purpose. It gives me room to vent and think things through.

Regardless of how unfair it is, there are people out there having worst. Finally, I hear it.¬†All the negativity…¬†pouring¬†from the sky like a torrent. The sky lightens up. All the pent up anger dissipates. The pouring of rain hides the tears of relief on my face.¬†I’m free.¬†

So, let me ask you this. Can you come up with 10 things your thankful for in your life? 

Daily Prompt: Gray